Audiobooks for people who think they don’t like audiobooks

I have tried audiobooks and I have found them wanting.

And before you think this is going to be one of those "listening to an audiobook isn't really reading" polemics, think again. However you consume a book, whether as a physical book, an eBook, an audiobook, or even Braille for that matter it's all reading and it all "counts"*.

So, no judgement if audiobooks work for you. They just typically don't for me... or at least they don't work for me when it's fiction that I'm listening to. I find it difficult to stay locked in with a story when I'm listening to it. Something about the way my brain works means that words being listened to versus words being seen doesn't activate the "I am fully absorbed in this world" state of being. The times I've tried listening to a novel on audiobook I've become distracted, had to relisten to passages because I realised I'd zoned out and hadn't been listening, and just generally found it difficult to build mental pictures of what's being narrated in a way that doesn't happen when I'm reading text. I suspect that this has something to do with my brain preferring visual input to auditory but I am not a neuroscientist.

A lot of fiction audiobooks are also read by actors who are American and pronounce words in weird ways that take me out of the story. I have been profoundly offended by someone pronouncing "plaid" as "played" or the word "shone" to rhyme with "phone" rather than "gone". You may or may not be the kind of person whose eyelid twitches at this kind of thing (I genuinely hope you are not - it's a curse). But I am one and I'm only mildly ashamed to say it hindered my enjoyment.

For a time I thought that the above meant that audiobooks were not for me, however after a bit of trial and error I've discovered the exact genre of audiobook that hits the spot:

• Memoir, autobiography or personal essays
• Read by the author
• Who is also a comedian/witty person
• Good voice or interesting accent also a bonus

Any time I try veering out of this very narrow channel of preference it's a mediocre to poor experience.

I've considered why this is the only kind of audiobook I like and I think it's because with an autobiography or memoir it's a person talking to you about their life - it feels a bit like a conversation (though one where one half isn't really holding up their end). It feels closer to the traditional way that people have told stories, sitting round a fire together hearing about "this wild thing that happened that time". Don't get me wrong, I love a good novel but it's an entirely different kind of storytelling from someone talking about their childhood (with jokes thrown in to cover the trauma). There's also typically a lot less world-building and physical descriptions, and more "and then I said to him..." I just find it a lot more engaging, and in some instances it's possibly even a better experience than the written word because comic timing and delivery can factor into your enjoyment.

Thanks, Moata. You've sold me on this incredibly specific type of audiobook. Where might I find some so I can see if my brain is similarly fussy?

I'm glad you asked, dear reader. Allow me...

• Everyone You Hate Is Going to Die by Daniel Sloss (bonus points for the Scottish accent - every time Sloss says the word "world" the r-rolling is a delight)
• Survival of the Thickest by Michelle Buteau (There is a tiny part of my brain that likes to replay Buteau's Jersey-girl accent saying "Ain't nobody got time for that, honey" in moments where I genuinely do NOT have time for that)
• Being A Dad Is Weird by Ben Falcone
• Dear Girls by Ali Wong
• Paddle your Own Canoe by Nick Offerman (Offerman's voice is sooo soothing - it's the auditory equivalent of running your hand over wood that has been thoroughly sanded with 400 grit paper)

And here are some more that I haven't listened to yet but are definite potential contenders in "audiobooks I have a generally favourable opinion of".

• Ten Steps to Nanette by Hannah Gadsby
• Glutton by Ed Gamble
• This American Woman by Zarna Garg
• The Last Black Unicorn by Tiffany Haddish 
• I Haven't Been Entirely Honest With You by Miranda Hart
• The Life of Dai by Dai Henwood
• Believe Me by Eddie Izzard
• That's a Great Question, I'd Love to Tell You by Elyse Myers
• Dish by Rhys Nicholson
• Straight Outta Crawley by Romesh Ranganathan
• You Can't Touch My Hair by Phoebe Robinson

Find more audiobooks in our collection (some of which you might even like)

* To whom? I put it to you that there is no Patron Saint of Reading looking over your shoulder and giving you gold stars for doing reading "the right way". If you'd like to imagine that there is and that you are nailing it then, fair play, I'll not yuck your yum but let's not get too precious about it, eh? (with apologies to Saint Scholastica, the actual Patron Saint of Reading - great name, babe)