Tonight, you are hot mass!
Petra Bagust and Niki Bezzant greeted the audience at the WORD Festival sold-out session of Hot Mess: Navigating Midlife and Menopause. There were over 300 people gathering there, most of them women at their forties or older.
The session began in a relaxing atmosphere. Each audience member found their seat lined with thoughtful self-care gifts for menopause. When the auditorium was filled with the sound of cheerful intro music, Petra and Niki stepped onto the stage with graceful dance-like movements.
The conversation between two inspiring speakers immediately created a personal connection with the audience. Niki talked about the changes of her career and marriage during her menopausal years. It was not until she began researching for her first book This Changes Everything, that she realised how the fluctuating hormone levels had played a part in those changes. Equipped with knowledge and deeper understanding of the midlife "hot mess", she said,
I am feeling very good. I feel I really know myself now. I got to know myself during the transition. It is a pretty good feeling.
Petra noticed her changes when she was outraged by a stranger online. She shared how she tried to understand what was happening but could not find a positive message on menopause. Determined to see the other side of the "hot mess", she talked to people and read books. She began to better understand changes to her brain though her ADHD added an extra layer of difficulty to this process.
As they openly and humorously shared their personal experience with menopause, the audience burst of laughter and applause while receiving positive messages on coping with this special period.
Niki and Petra then moved onto "Menopause 101"- the basics. Rather than giving a scientific lecture, they made this part interactive and fun. Niki explained concepts like menopause and perimenopause and how the oestrogen level drops unsteadily during the transition with plain language. Petra jokingly referred it to "reverse puberty" to help the audience better understand the experience.
When discussing top seven perimenopause signs featured in Niki's books, they invited audience members to identify their own stage of menopause and raised their hands. While handing out special gifts to those women, they offered supportive and caring messages saying,
You are at the right place, tonight. You are not alone!
While they were digging deeper into challenges of menopause and perimenopause, the chat between them flowed smoothly. They vividly illustrated the mood changes brought on by menopause through their own experience. They encouraged those in need to ask for help or consider therapy as the symptoms are often misunderstood and mistreated.
Meanwhile, they highlighted the positive side of menopause. Niki explained that perimenopause is temporary, comparing the changes in the brain to a computer system being restructured. When she shared scientific evidence on the cognitive flexibility of women's midlife brain and their better cognitive performance than the same-aged men, the audience responded cheerfully. Petra then guided the audience through a breathing exercise to show how to manage sudden mood shifts.
Weight and food are major concerns for women in midlife. Using their own weight as an example, Niki and Petra convinced the audience that the weight alone is not a reliable indicator of health. Instead, they emphasised the importance of maintaining the muscle mass. This naturally led them to a discussion about consistent exercises with accessible and manageable manners. Petra commented that building muscle is to work towards the point of failure and encouraged people to challenge themselves to their limits. This reminded me of the instructional exercise images in Niki's book The Everything Guide.
Talking about hormone therapy, Niki explained, backed by scientific evidence, that for most women, it is not dangerous and can be beneficial, particular for those struggling with sleep. She emphasised that it is not a magic pill, although the evidence shows its positive effect on relieving hot flushes, strengthening bone density, and improving heart health. She further elaborated on the roles of different types of hormone used in therapy and how they can improve women's life quality.
The audience thoroughly enjoyed the session, which combines scientific evidence, jokes, personal experiences and reflections, along with positive interactions. Both the speakers and the audience laughed throughout the Q&A section.
Finally, Petra thanked the audience and said,
Thank you for changing the national conversation on menopause. We are hanging out here - We laughed, we learned...
Find out more
- Find titles by Niki Bezzant in the catalogue
- Browse our WORD Christchurch 2025 page
- Visit the WORD Christchurch website
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